Do you listen? How About Your Child? – Shane B. Kulman

“He doesn’t listen.” I heard this statement from another teacher to a parent upon dismissal. It’s rung in my head from 10 years ago, when I began teaching. I’ve had many parents tell me, their child’s teacher has reported “he/she doesn’t listen.” You know what?! I find that those same parents don’t listen either.

What’s up with the apple tree?

Do you forget people’s names as soon as they introduce themselves? Why does this happen to certain people and not others.

People including children have different listening styles,  this is why I feel school testing is not a fair assessment of what a child comprehends.  As a parent, it’s important to know your child’s learning style, so you can assist in their learning, or have a conversation with his/her teacher.

What can be done if you are speaking and someone is not listening? What if you are a different kind of learner, and cannot focus on what someone is saying when they are speaking to you?

I was giving a talk to educators, and I saw one woman in the back using her cell phone and completely not listening, I decided to focus on the specific question she asked me to address “a child who would not listen to her.   I spoke about exactly what she was doing,  being pre-occupied with something that was not happening in the present moment.   She did not tune in to me once about how to problem solve this issue.

Another time I was speaking to my friend, I saw a gaze come over his eyes, I told him, “I see your not listening to me right now.” We laughed. The sad part of this whole topic is, some people do not even realize when someone is not listening to them. EVEN crazier is to see two people talking to each other and neither is listening. The best thing to do when dreading having a conversation with someone, is to set your intention to: show up and just listen to them. See what happens…

Alot of LISTENING comes down to self worth, and feeling enough.  Many people,  feel they have to do a lot of talking to prove themselves, to be heard (by everyone.) When in fact there is so much power in silence.

There are so many disorders for children who don’t listen: auditory processing disorder, poor attending skills, dysfunctional listening, easily distractible, receptive language disorder, etc.  Why is this so common?

Next time you are in a place where you can watch people having conversations, observe them, see their body language, and apply what you observe and learn to yourself. How can you be a better listener?  How can you really tune in to what someone is saying to you without over talking or interrupting. Are you fully present when your child is sharing something with you? Do you look at him/her in the eyes and give them your full self?

Using good listening skills will turn the children in our lives into quality listeners, whatever their learning style is.

Happy listening!

10 Need to Know Yoga Tips By: Kate Stone

Great Article I found!  This is written with my sentiments exactly;) Enjoy and check out Kate Stone

 

Dear New Student:

I want you to like yoga. I do. And I want your body to like you, too. But with class sizes exploding, there are a few things you should know going into your practice. Trust me, your wallet, your family, and your body will thank me in the long run. Probably also the short run.

If you’re new, be new.
Six classes do not make you experienced, used to yoga or a “yogi.” If the teacher says, “for advanced students,” 98 percent of the time it will never mean you, even if you’ve been practicing for years. “For advanced students” means, “if this pose feels easy, you are steady and you can do more while also breathing, then you may move on to this other crazy thing.” So, 98 percent of the time you will not do the crazy thing. Do not confuse that with weakness.

Yoga is not for everyone.
You might feel like this is a life-changing, orgasmic epiphany—that this bendy-Zen-ness must be good for all people everywhere, but it’s not. Stop trying to convert everyone you know. Yeah, I know, they might love it and it might be crazy super awesome for their herniated discs or whatever, but just stop.Yoga is not a religion, it is not a cult, and all that is good about it gets diluted exponentially with armchair evangelists.

If it hurts, stop.
Are there poses that are uncomfortable, bordering on pain? Yes. Get to know the differences between tiredness in your muscles, stretch in your ligaments and pure, straight pain in your body. Pain is a sign that tells your brain your body is in danger. Listen to it.

If nothing in #3 made any sense to you, you are not ready for a class with 40 people in it.
Try one with three people. One where you can ask questions about pain.

Figure out why you’re doing this.
Why are you going to class? Why are you pushing to the next pose? Why is it important to you to breathe heavily and move your body and step your foot forward? You may not have answers but asking these questions helps you figure out how you move around in space. Having a “why” also keeps you in the room when your brain goes, “Boooorrring.”

Yoga is personal.
Asana is particular to the person experiencing the poses at this specific point in time and space. The man with his head on the floor and the woman with her head on her knee are at their individual max.Stop comparing your limits to theirs. You cannot possibly know how anything feels to anyone else. Just because they look like they’re further along doesn’t mean it doesn’t feel just as difficult in their respective bodies.

If you want to win, go to CrossFit.
There are no Yoga Olympics. There is no “good, better, best,” or PRs at yoga. You might stick a handstand one day and then really suck at it later that same day. An important part of practicing yoga is being present in the moment, no matter what’s happening. And another important part is embracing impermanence. No matter how awful or how awesome, that handstand isn’t going to last and it isn’t going to win you any points.

Looks are deceiving.
Yoga was not designed to make 20-something white girls be as skinny as possible. Do not forget this. Never forget this.

You don’t need to buy anything. 
Beyond the class, that is…you can’t just run into a studio like a Zen vigilante. Studios are businesses, after all. But with that comes all the other commercial interests businesses hold, like retail options and marketing ploys. The capitalist side of yoga makes a lot of money from teacher trainings in particular and they do not care about you quite as much as you think. Don’t be sad, just don’t start teacher training after practicing yoga for only a couple of months. Please.

Breathe at your own pace.
For years, I hated Upward-Facing Dog. I would inhale to Up Dog and then the teacher would start talking and we would stay there and I would sway like a suspension bridge and continue to inhale, inhale, inhale…and then finally push back to Down Dog in a great huff of exhalation.

1It wasn’t until I started an Ashtanga practice that I realized you are, in fact, allowed to breathe like a normal human even if your pace doesn’t match the cues. This also proves the point that there are four billion* types of asana practice, and you can only benefit from trying more than one. It may prove just how gullible I was as a teenager too, but you, hopefully are just new to yoga, not to life.

*Pure exaggeration, not a factual number.

About Kate Stone

Kate Stone started taking yoga in middle school as a rebellious move against sports camp. After years of gymnastics, not having to flip over after a backbend was a relief, and the practice stuck. After college, Kate moved to Chicago to teach mean children how to read. She was marginally successful but felt severely, physically ill-equipped to deal with the fighting in her classroom. As someone who takes things literally, she became a personal trainer. Kate spent eight years in Chicago working in gyms, bars and museums, feeling like she was supposed to have a real job. Last year she realized she doesn’t ever want one of those. Kate spent all of her money on yoga training, and is now a yoga teacher, writer and bartender living in Boston.

Care of the Caregiver… YOU!

“Care of the Caregiver… YOU!” ~Shane B. Kulman

I remember the first time I heard this. How clear and “right” it sounded.  As the phrase unfolded in my head, I realized that I was a caregiver, and that working in a classroom 5 days a week, 8-3:30 and then coming home to eat a slice of pizza and collapse was not going to work for me anymore. That was NOT caring about the caregiver, and I was caregiving for 25 students and a wacky assistant that year.  No more…

I’ve graduated and will occasionally take a several week or month vacation during the school year, is this extreme caregiving for myself?  I think, no.  Some say extreme, I bet some say spoiled…  I now understand the importance of bookends. When I set out to work, I am aware that before and after I must include time where I do something for myself.  It may be a simple cup of tea, or a massage/spa visit.

I believe everyone is a caregiver in some aspect. Parents, Grandparents, Aunties and Uncles, babysitters, teachers, therapists, Nurses, Doctors, dog owners… you get the idea.

The parents I work with that have children with special needs, are constantly caregiving. There have been very few who make the time to withdraw from caring about others and take care of their Self.  So many parents pick food from their children’s plates, or eat standing up, don’t get dressed or spend every last penny on their child. After a while the caregiving well, goes dry. Parents often feel drained, wasted of energy and limited in   options. When I suggest a yoga class, a writing class, or to join in to any group activity that does not revolve around parenting, they look at me like I’m a dreamer, like I’m out of touch with reality, and then I see the guilt forming, “WHAT!?!? spend time on myself?!!?!? When my child is so far behind?”  I even suggested to a Mom to go out to dinner with Dad with a dress on, and I would stay with the children, she laughed at me and said we talk and eat when the kids go to school. Hmmmm, is this the same as wearing a dress at a restaurant?  I think not.

Children learn from watching, this has been researched and proven.  If all the young girls are watching their Mothers caregive and serve constantly, how will they learn to be independent and self expansive?  Special needs children, including non-verbal children see and feel what is going on around them. I see the neediest children become ultra demanding when they are in need of something. What happens after their demand, that may result in a temper tantrum/meltdown?  A Parent is running to serve them. What is the valuable lesson here? Yup, the bigger the meltdown and demand, the faster a parent runs.

Children with or without special needs, even pets, learn how to rule through behavior and reactions. I believe there is always time to be made for caring for the caregiver. Even if its a bath, or journaling time. I would say shopping, but you know who gets shopped for… everyone else.

Dearest friends – No matter who you are caring for. You can serve them on a higher level, if you take time to serve yourself. Your health and those you love will love you for it.

Namaste and love yourself,

Shane

The Throat Chakra – The key to expressing your truth Guest Blogger Terese Kerr

The Throat Chakra – The key to expressing your truth

“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” - Maya Angelou

We are verbal beings. We currently live in a mass culture dominated by the word, and our current popular culture seems to thrive on gossip, actively encouraging its citizens to talk about other people. Our word is powerful, and the way in which we speak our words has great influence and real impact in our lives.

Who has not experienced the feeling of choking up, of being unable to speak? We struggle at times to ‘find the right words’. We may feel we say the ‘wrong’ thing, and experience harmful words flying from our mouths before we can stop them. At other times, we may force ourselves to stay quiet, to avoid trouble, when we truly have something we want to say.

All of these situations may indicate an imbalance in the throat chakra. This chakra is the home and source of truthful and meaningful communication. The Sanskrit name for the throat chakra Vissudha, means purification. When we team this concept of purification with the purpose of this chakra, we begin to understand that truthful communication which is clean and wise, impeccable and full of integrity is not only desirable – it is good for us. When we have a healthy throat chakra, we are mindful of what we say, and why we are saying it.

Another important function of the throat chakra is the act of listening. This includes listening to the outer world with our physical ears, as well as listening to our internal world. When we focus attention internally and listen to what our bodies are telling us, we begin to hear the truth of our own inner story. Thoughts and fears are trying to communicate. Body sensations carry meaning and a yearning to be heard. As we begin to hear our inner story, we experience a deeper resonance with our true self.

The throat chakra is also the gateway to our unique creative expression. Creativity, be it through dance, art, language or music, gives expression to our inner discoveries. We can develop our creative self through awakening the throat chakra.

As we open and heal the throat chakra, we actively begin to speak in a way that creates a more harmonious life. We open up to authentic self-expression and we become more attentive to our own truths, as well as the truths of others.

The throat chakra, more than any other, governs our relationship with vibrations and resonance. We can resonate with the vibrations of music, people, ideas, environments or even the universe. When we find this resonance, a sense of harmony and rhythm is experienced. When not in resonance, we sense a feeling of discord. We may feel that we do not fit in or belong.

Although the energy of the throat chakra is more subtle than the lower chakra energies, it’s still incredibly powerful. Just think of how a singer can break glass with her voice – the vibrations from this chakra can and do affect matter and therefore us. We all tune into vibes all the time. Working with the throat chakra increases our awareness of this energy and its impact.

There are a variety of techniques to aid purification including what the Buddhists call ‘wise speech’, periods of verbal silence and the practice of chanting. When the throat chakra becomes purified, we awaken to the more subtle communication abilities of telepathy.

Evaluating your throat chakra:

Simply answer YES or NO to each of the statements below. The more YES answers you can honestly give yourself, the better you are balanced in the throat centre.

∆ I am a good listener.

∆ I do not gossip about others behind their backs.

∆ I have a good sense of rhythm.

∆ I have a strong clear voice.

∆ My creative life is important to me.

∆ I am able to express myself clearly and effectively.

∆ I pick up on ‘vibes’ easily.

Balancing your throat chakra:

Chakradance – The dance of Expression

Blending free-flowing movements with particular frequencies of sound, Chakradance is a dynamic dance journey through the 7 chakras. The movements of the throat chakra have been inspired by many ancient dances. So many cultures all over the planet interweave the voice and dance to increase the awareness of spirit. The Greek word horus refers to both dance and song, and is the origin of the word chorus. In Ancient Egypt, performers often danced while reciting poetry, while in Hawaii, chant and dance are blended to communicate the story. In Tibetan culture, mystical rituals performed by monks interweave chanting and sound (gyaling horns, cymbals and bells), with delicate movements of the body. In Chakradance, we weave sound and movement in a ‘mantra-dance’ to intensify our self- expression and creativity.

In our classes, we complete the dance of expression with the creation of a personal “mandala” artwork, which we find helps to integrate and contain the energy that has come up during the dance.

For more information on Chakradance classes and music specifically to dance the throat chakra go towww.chakradance.com/

Throat chakra crystals:
Turquoise, aquamarine, sodalite

These crystals may be placed on the location of the throat chakra (throat cavity) for clearing, revitalising and healing. You may even choose to carry one of these crystals with you throughout your day.

Throat chakra oils:
Eucalyptus, lavender, chamomile, frankincense

These oils can be used in massage treatments, burned in an oil burner or you may even add a few drops in to your bath.

Affirmations:

“I allow the truth to speak through me.”

“I am heard.”

“Creativity flows through me.”

“It is my essence to create.”

“When I listen I hear the truth.”

“I am able to speak to others clearly and eloquently.”

“It is good, right, and safe for me to express my true essence.”

“My truth is necessary.”

“I allow my essence to express itself in my life.”

Affirmations are a powerful way of communicating with your inner self. Use these positive messages (or find your own) as part of your healing process for your throat chakra.

5 Top Tips for balancing your throat chakra:

1. Have the intention of always being open and honest with your communication. Try to keep communication meaningful, not indulging in gossip, lies and pointless chit-chat.

2. Be mindful of the Buddhist precept of wise speech: “Is it true, is it kind, is it necessary, is it the right time?”

3. Acknowledge that ‘listening’ is as much a part of communication as talking, and practice active listening.

4. Be open to higher levels of communication (telepathy, clairaudience, channelling).

5. Explore ways of connecting with your innate authentic creativity eg. dance, painting, the way you dress, cooking etc.

The Humming Breath:

Practice this simple breathing technique regularly to activate your throat chakra…

Sit in a comfortable position with a straight spine. Begin by exhaling as much air as possible from your lungs before taking in a deep, slow breath through your nose, refilling your lungs. On your next exhalation, make a soft humming sound like a bee. When you run out of breath, take another deep inhalation, continuing the humming sound as you exhale. Begin with a few minutes practice, working up to 10-15 minutes at a time. When you have finished your humming breath practice, lie down and relax for a few minutes.

Everyday ways to balance your throat chakra:

Experiment with wearing the colour sky-blue or bring this colour more into your life. Open yourself to some new creative projects – it may be as simple as getting creative with your wardrobe or experimenting with an unexplored medium like sculpting! Spend a few minutes each day chanting the seed sound of the throat chakra which is “hum” or find a mantra that works for you. Be sensitive to your environment and the people around you and try and tune into the “vibes” – what resonates for you and what doesn’t? Listen to your own inner voice!

I’ll be talking about the third eye chakra, and how to balance it, next week.

Namaste,

Natalie Southgate – Founder of Chakradance.
Website – www.chakradance.com/
Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/Chakradance

How to Teach Chores to your Special Needs * Taken from THE FRIENDSHIP CIRCLE

How To Teach Chores To Your Special Needs Child

  By Karen Wang

I was chatting with another parent at the Friendship Circle recently, and I mentioned that my 10 year old son, who has autism and severe learning disabilities, does the dishes at our house.

“What?  He does chores?”

Yes, in fact, Louie also does the laundry without being asked.  And he vacuums his room.  And he puts away his own clothes, books and toys.  And he shovels snow.  He does everything with a big smile.

“How did you teach him to do all of that?”

Well, it took a really long time for him to learn.  We had to find the right motivation, and we had to break everything down into simple steps.  But somehow it clicked.  This is how the learning process unfolded for us.

Step #1: Start with Self Care

My husband and I started to make long-term plans for our son while he was still in preschool.  We realized that he was going to need extra help learning basic life skills.

We introduced self-care: brushing his own teeth, running a bath at the right temperature, washing his body.  We always made it a point to comment positively on his independence in this area, but we did not give him any other reward.

Step #2:  Experiment

with Sticker Charts

We tried sticker charts for doing tasks around the house.  The list of chores would have one or two self-care tasks, a household task that he had already mastered and a household task that he had not yet mastered.

Our son had absolutely no interest in these sticker charts for several years.  But we noticed that he liked to vacuum and switch electric items on and off.  We decided to let him vacuum as much as he wanted, and we even got him a Shark motorized sweeper, because it is lighter and quieter than a regular vacuum.

Step #3: Incorporate Privileges

Eventually, Louie started asking for extra privileges.  His most prized privilege was a weekend morning out with either me or my husband.

Those sticker charts suddenly became attractive.  His first successful job chart only had 2 jobs on it: read 20 minutes per day with Mom and unload the clean dishes from the dishwasher with Dad.  This involved re-organizing the kitchen so that all dishes were accessible to him.  We had to talk him through the unloading process and show him the correct place for every single item.

Step #4: Add one task at a time

We added a new job to his chart as soon as he mastered the previous task.  We talked openly about how everyone in the family was benefiting from Louie’s assistance.

Every shelf in Louie’s closet was labeled, and every evening I gave him 10 items of his clothing to identify and place on the correct shelf.  The single most challenging task for Louie was to pick up 10 

toys or books off the floor and to put each item back in the correct place.  This required categorizing items out of context.

Step #5:  Work on new tasks together

Our weekend outings taught Louie the value of shared activities.  He noticed that my husband and I were finishing up the dishes after he unloaded the dishwasher, and he noticed the time spent doing laundry.

Louie decided that he wanted to be more involved, because it meant that he could spend more time with his parents.  This was a major turning point for him.  He started loading the dirty clothes in the washing machine, and I taught him how to measure the detergent and switch on the machine.  He loved setting and turning on the machine.

Step #6: Practice makes perfect!

Scaffolding is the art of putting supports in place so that a person can learn a new skill.  Louie needed plenty of scaffolding to learn how to load dirty dishes into the dishwasher.

He had to learn how to rinse, sort and arrange everything.  He spilled an awful amount of dirty dishwater on the kitchen floor and counters.  We often had to run the dishwasher twice to get everything clean.  But we responded positively and showed him the correct way to load.  Even the lightest, most gentle criticism was upsetting to him.

Step #7:  Remove the Scaffolding

We slowly removed the scaffolding from the daily chores and invited Louie to join us in whatever we were doing.

He doesn’t have a job chart anymore.  Louie loves to help me prepare meals: he prefers to set the oven for me, because pressing electronic buttons is such a delight.  He learned how to sort our dirty laundry into whites, colors and delicates.

Last weekend he wanted to watch his dad change the oil in the car.  We keep adding new tasks to his repertoire, and we make sure that the experience is social and lighthearted.  Louie has a long way to go in his developmental skills, but every day I kiss him and say, “Thank you for helping me today.”

Filed Under: Parenting Tagged With: Chores, jobs, Life Skills, Scaffolding, Sticker Charts

About Karen

Karen Wang is a Friendship Circle parent. You may have seen her sneaking into the volunteer lounge for ice cream or being pushed into the cheese pit by laughing children. She is a contributing author to the anthology “My Baby Rides the Short Bus: The Unabashedly Human Experience of Raising Kids With Disabilities”

30 Under 30: Amy Gravino

30 Under 30: Amy Gravino.

Amy Gravino – Age 29

 

Asperger’s Syndrome College Coach, Autism Advocate, Writer

Written by Lindsay Chapman, MA, BCBA, Assistant Director of ABA4U NJ

On the night we met Amy, she was radiant in a bright red party dress, and had a warm smile and welcoming eyes. Lisa immediately recognized Amy from class at Caldwell College, and with her gregarious and outgoing nature, within minutes Amy was telling Lisa and me about her Masters thesis, in which she taught men with Asperger’s how to appropriately ask for a date. I was not surprised to later find out that not only had Amy conquered college life, but that she had also addressed the United Nations as part of an Autism Speaks panel. There was not a shy bone in her body, and I immediately wanted to become her friend.

As a young girl in grade school, her peers were not as congenial. In fact, Amy cannot recall many pleasant interactions with girls her age. She was the victim of frequent bullying, and her peers failed to understand her social aberrations. Amy can still describe the pain that these experiences caused her in vivid detail:

“When you are a kid, you care more about what your peers think. I internalized everything they said about me and heard it in my own head all day long. I wanted to take my own life. I wanted to commit suicide.”

Amy solemnly recalls her own resiliency:

“One day, I just decided not to listen anymore to those voices in my head telling me that I couldn’t do certain things.”

And with that, she began confronting all of the tasks she was told she could not accomplish. She applied for college and lived on campus, where her social life blossomed.  Amy went on to become the first female with Asperger’s Syndrome to graduate with a Masters degree from the Applied Behavior Analysis program at Caldwell College. Since then, she has opened her own business, A.S.C.O.T Coaching, LLC, in which she coaches other students on the spectrum through the college process. She is also an autism advocate and serves on the board of several non-profit agencies as a voice for individuals on the spectrum, including the Board of Directors for the Global and Regional Asperger Syndrome Partnership (GRASP), Standing Committees for Autism Speaks, and the Daniel Jordan Fiddle Foundation. Amy lives independently in an apartment in New Jersey.

As an advocate, one of Amy’s goals is to make others aware that individuals on the autism spectrum are not so different from their “neurotypical “peers. As we chatted like old friends, Amy described her current dating life, divulging:

“It’s not that I do not trust men, it’s that I do not trust my own judgment.”

To which I retorted, “Do you know how many of my girlfriends have made that exact statement to me over a glass of wine?!”

We laughed, and then Amy told me about one of her most recent projects, a book called, “The Naughty Autie.” In this book, she provides a firsthand perspective on what dating is like for individuals on the spectrum.

“People either think that we don’t have sexual feelings, or they are uncomfortable acknowledging that we do, so no one talks about it,” she relays. In one chapter, she describes in detail what it was like to lose her virginity: the sounds, the smells, and the tactile touches. Instead of ignoring and suppressing these feelings, Amy feels it is important to acknowledge them and teach appropriate behaviors.

Amy now speaks to college campuses regarding issues surrounding sex and safety for individuals on the autism spectrum. She is every bit the dauntless female, “heroine of her own life,” a la Sarah Jessica Parker in Sex and the City. We could not be more proud of how she represents and inspires the people that she comes into contact with on a daily basis.

Amy’s goals for the future are to find a publisher for her book and to appear onEllen to promote awareness about life on the autism spectrum. We are fortunate to have met such an extraordinary young woman and look forward to hearing about how she succeeds her many new adventures in the future.

For more information visit:

http://www.amygravino.com

Autism Speaks:

www.autismspeaks,org

GRASP:

www.GRASP.org

Daniel Jordan Fiddle Foundation:

http://www.djfiddlefoundation.org/

ABA 4 U NJ:

www.aba4unj.org

Caldwell College:

http://www.caldwell.edu/autism/

How YOU could help a Special Needs Parent By Rob Gorski, Guest Blogger

How YOU could help a Special Needs Parent.

As the rates of #Autism continues to skyrocket, the likely hood of you knowing someone that is a special needs parent is growing as well. Maybe you already know someone with a special needs child. Perhaps, a friend or family member.In this article, I hope to give you some simple ways that you can help the special needs parent in your life. Knowing what to say or do can be daunting for someone that doesn’t have experience with special needs parenting. This is probably where many people, with the best of intentions, get scared off. Seeing what a special needs parent goes through can be a very overwhelming experience for anyone.

It may even seem so dire that one might feel that they have nothing to offer, that could possible be of any benefit. I hope to change that by sharing a few very simple, very basic ideas, that can provide much needed relief to a special needs parent and let them know that they aren’t alone.

So, you have a friend or loved one that is a special needs parent. Do you want to offer help or support but don’t know what you could possibly do? First of all, let me thank you for showing compassion, concern and love for the special needs parent in your life. Honestly, to a special needs parent, just knowing that someone cares is really important. In fact, it’s so important, that I don’t think it can be overstated.

Taken from LOST AND TIRED, ROB GORSKI

 

If you have ever wanted to offer help to a special needs parent but maybe don’t know how, this article is for you. Perhaps their situation is so difficult, you don’t know how you could possibly help. There are some things you can do to help even if they don’t seem like much.

One of the toughest parts of being a special needs parent is the feeling of isolation.  Their child requires so much of their time, energy and undivided attention that they often times have little or no adult contact (aside from doctors and therapists). You could make plans to stop by for a visit. Many special needs parents will tell you that they would love to just talk to another adult. Please remember to call first as a surprise visit could just add to the stress by destabilizing or overstimulating their child.

Sometimes, by the end of the day, exhaustion is such that the thought of making dinner is simply to much. Perhaps you could also offer to bring dinner over so they have one less thing to worry about. It would be a very nice gesture and could really help take some of the load off their shoulders.Remember that their child may have special dietary or sensory needs so it would be a good idea to do some research by calling and asking what would be a good meal to prepare for them.

Things as simple as sending a card, email or text message, just to let them know you’re thinking about them could help them to find the strength to keep moving on a really bad day.

If you wanted, you could send them a gift card for groceries or maybe their favorite take-out. There is often times a tremendous financial burden associated with special needs parenting and maybe a gift card will help them provide groceries for their family, if things are tight that week.Think about making arrangements to go over and spend some time with their child (if that’s something that would work). Educating yourself about Autism of whatever else the parent is dealing with is important for something like this. Not only will educating yourself help you relate to their child, but knowing that you took the time to learn about their child’s condition would mean a great deal to any special needs parent.

As their child likely requires all their time and energy, every single day, things around the house and yard tend to take a back burner. You could help with lawn care or repairs to the house. Wash a sink load of dishes or fold the laundry.

The list of possibilities is endless really.

The most critical thing you will be doing, is showing them that they are not alone. Sometimes just knowing that their are people who love and support you, standing in your corner, can mean more then you can possibly imagine.

Please remember that you don’t have to understand anything about Autism in order to show love, compassion and support to those touched by it.

 http://lostandtired.com/2011/04/22/how-you-could-help-a-special-needs-parent/